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Hi Guys!!! Welcome to My New Website
From My Inbox To You
All you friends, relatives and brothers of the fish send me a lot of funny, interesting, thought provoking and/or actionable stuff!! I'm forever gonna forward them and I do fine until it comes time to decide "who gets what". Then, mostly because I have the extra server space, it occurred to me to put it all online - give you the URL and let you decide what you want to see/save/forward for yourselves.
Oh, the graphics to the right are some of the Internet Bumperstickers you've all been dying for. I didn't send them as much as I thought I would but that doesn't make them less funny (IMHO). Lift and use as you like. I'll change them out from time to time.
Soooooo, here we are. Come back to visit often, I plan to update every time someone sends me something that I can use. Also, please be patient. This little brainstorm is brand new. It will get better as time goes by and as you give me good ideas. In the meantime, I'll just try to categorize these things and give you a heads-up about certain ones that are a little risque'. Hope that some of this entertains you, maybe even brings a smile to your sullen faces. -- Richard
STAY TUNED - MORE OF THESE WILL BE ADDED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE
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MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentations |
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We'll begin to see MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentations scattered throughout this site and I thought I'd better offer a few words of advice. My luck with using MicroSoft products online is shakey at best and PowerPoint is no exception. Offline performance is generally fine. So, when I offer you one of these things I'll give you a text URL that you can cut-and-paste into the address bar of your PowerPoint application. It appears that .pps files are supposed to open online. I've never been able to make one do that. For you folks with fortune like mine, I'll also give you a download link. These presentations are normally high quality and worth the download effort or I wouldn't bother with them. If you do not have MS PowerPoint, you can download a free viewer from the MicroSoft web site that will allow you to view any of the presentations. Alternatively, download a viewer from one of these links: PC VIEWER(2.8MB) MAC VIEWER(4.7MB)
Some of the presentations have audio tracks but you should be aware that older versions of MS PowerPoint do not support audio. If you are in the market for one of the viewers above and want sound, too, I'd suggest a visit to the MicroSoft web site for the latest version of the PP viewer. As always, I'm interested to know your experience with any of this.
Funny Stuff 
TODAY'S POLITICS, GOVERNMENT AND MILITARY - COULD IT GET MORE WIERD?
This one's a little old by now. The elections have been held and THE MILTARY has spoken to at least one Congressman. Rated G. Not sure, think credit should go to sweet Pam G.
Abu al-Zarqawi was a fairly mean individual. But he got his! Rated PG. Thanx cousin Doug S.
Cowboys & Indians - Montana style. Rated G. Thanx bro Jim V.
Human Bomb Class - ever wonder what one of those must be like? Rated PG-13, language.
The Bush Boyz finally publish an Irag agenda. Rated PG, language.
The United States Redneck Special Forces will have the situation in Iraq well in hand - shortly. Rated G. Thanx cousin Doug S.
Dancing Muhammed Comes To Town - if you miss the end, you've missed the best part. Rated G.
Elmer Fudd is one of my favorite cartoon characters, Wabbit!. And some of them Iwackis need huntin'! Thanx bro Ed H. and Subsowespac.org
News Bulletin................Navy Releases Terrorist Rated G. Thanx cousin Doug S.
Political Promises - some things never change. Rated G. Thanx cousin Doug S.
Jesse Jackson tries but Little Johnny Teaches About Tragedy. Rated G. Thanx cousin Doug S.
Hu's on First? - a parody of the "Who's On First" skit (Abbott & Costello) featuring George Bush. Rated PG. Thanx cousin Doug S.
George Carlin's Solution to Save Gasoline - makes perfect sense to me. Rated G. Thanx cousin Jim V.
Granny Says - In Saudi Arabia they're referred to as "rags", "ragheads" or worse. But don't get me started. Rated PG. Thanx bro David L.
The Power of Makeup and Lighting - you be the judge. Rated G. Thanx Doug S.
The Plan According to Robin Williams - it makes perfect sense to me. Rated G. Thanx Jim V.
THE MILITARY - maybe some don't realize. Rated G. Thanx Al N.
Kentucky--Hillary - some days it's better just to keep your piehole shut! Thanx Doug S.
A Bar in Texas - sad but sooooo true. Thanx Al N.
Many Times Most Of Us Feel This Way!! - and kinda sums it all up. Thanx Ed H.
Man, I'll bet there are thousands of stories from Katrina and Rita that are similar to this one. One thing is glaringly evident. If you've got real estate problems in Louisiana, go see this gentleman. He'll get you a Clear Title and loan approval. - Thanx Al N.
My cousin Doug S. says "Problem Solved ". He's a bright man, wonder what he's up to. 
STRESS MANAGEMENT
DEEP THOUGHT FOR THE DAY - Slinkies, people and such. Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
MORE DEEP THOUGHTS - Rated G.
Manage Your Stress - having a rough day? You're gonna love this. Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
Another Bad Day is about a guy who IS having a bad day. He has to take all the ice and snow off his car. Then he discovers something...... Love winter like me? You're gonna love this. If that link doesn't work, EMAIL me and I'll send you a copy. Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
Zen Thoughts - enjoy, grasshoppa! Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
OUR ANIMAL FRIENDS
There's this Bear In a Bar in Billings...... Awwwwwww. Rated PG-13 for a little language at the end. Thanx sweet Pam G., weak humor at its best. With alliteration, no less.
Elephants Are Remarkable Animals - Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
Pam G. advises us to Be Careful What You Wish For. - Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
Monkey with a Deathwish - "This Monkey is a Friggin' Idiot." - TyPalmer.com. The only rational explanation is that they're young animals, not hungry animals. Rated G.
Man's Best Friend - Pam G. sez, "I love this tooooo much!". [Me, three. Dogs are the best.] Rated G.
Dog Pack Attacks Gator In Florida - strange but carnally true. Pic's worth a thousand. Thanx Pam G. Rated G.
MEN AND WOMEN
UCLA's Study - what kind of face do women find attractive on a man? Rated G.
Why I Fired My Secretary - see, it was my birthday and nobody seemed to remember...... Rated G. Thanx
cousin Doug S.
This Navajo Woman was veeeery astute. Rated G. Thanx cousin Doug S.
OK, this woman found the Perfect Husband but she wasn't exactly married to him. Rated G. Thanx cousin Doug S.
Jim V. has sent us this clipping from a 1955 Good Housekeeping Magazine. Brian W. asks, "Was this on planet Earth???" [Yes, I remember; however, I never lived in no crib like dat. -- Richard]. Rated G. Thanx Jim.
A LITTLE GRAVEYARD HUMOR....... - ever wonder about others' grief in cemeteries? This won't do much to help :)! Thanx Al N.
Men
HOW TO TELL THE SEX OF A BIRD - Rated G. Thanx bro David L.
A poor fisherman's writing to DR. PHIL for advice. He and his Bait Shop owner friend have been catchin' some lunker bass. Now his wife's got her chickens all scattered over it! Imagine that. Rated G. Thanx bro Jim V. 
Scam Artists are terrorizing men in shopping mall parking lots. BEWARE, MEN EVERYWHERE!! Rated G. Thanx cousin Doug S. for alerting us to this scourge on the face of America.
In other news, our friend Jim V. is warning us about More Scam Artists preying on unsuspecting men. Shame on you, scoundrels. Another scourge. Rated PG.
Women
Women - six retro graphics of girls saying what they REALLY think. Rated PG. Thanx bro Jim V., I believe.
How To Think Like A Woman - it should more appropriately be called "The Difference Between Men and Women". See, a man would have just come right out and said that there was an issue with genital herpes. But I will concede that the first guy was pretty presumptuous. There are comments below the video. I have one, too, it's too profane to publish here. Think about a fork sticking in that woman and you'll begin to underestand. Sheeesh, that guy in the white shirt was minding his own business!!!!!!! Thanx Pam G., I guess.
SENIOR CITIZENSHIP
Well, it's like my old fishin' bud used to say, "Richard, don't ever get old." Here's some Senior Bumperstickers that you can print and paste on your "Lark". No fair "trickin' it out". Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
Can You Relate to This? - if so, you've lived a full and wonderful life. Somebody close this casket...... Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
No Nursing Home for Me! - this is definitely worth considering but the dollars seem skewed to me. Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
HMO - Rated PG. Thanx Ed H.
Medicare, Part D - crying shame. Rated G. Thanx Doug S.
Do you remember? - a walk down Memory Lane, as it were. Rated G. Thanx Robert T.
LET'S STAY HEALTHY
You already know that Water Is Good For Us. Drink lots but not too much! Thanx bro Jim V.
If we listen to our docs, we need to go in for our Colonoscopies. These folks managed to keep their sense of humor, too. Thanx Doug S.
JUST JOKES
A Bad Day - some days you just can't make a nickel. Rated G.
Confucius say, "Old Chinese Proverb" - my eyes are going, guess I better get some. Rated PG. Thanx cousin Al N.
THE BATHTUB TEST . . . - that never occurred to me. Rated G.
McDonald's Coupon - yummmmmmmm. Rated PG, language.
Everybody needs a Sick Day but Hung Chow adds new dimension to the phrase. Rated G. Thanx bro Jim V.
Pfft.......lawyers - Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
It's football time, again! Cast your vote for The South's Best Cheerleaders. Thanx Pam G.
Would You Be Willing? - Thanx Al N.
The Father made his Customs Declaration without lying. Thanx bro Ed H. and Subsowespac.org.
I Fixed My PC - take a look. Thanx bro Jim V.
Old Noah was a tolerant man but The Woodpecker Might Have To Go! Thanx Pam G.
Communicate! - OK, sometimes new citizens have trouble with a language and other measures must be employed. Thanx Al N.
Thanx Amanda C. for sending these in. You're right, they are Too Funny Not to Send!
Southern Humor - courtesy of cousin Al N. Great God Almighty, I'm glad to be a grandson of the Southland!
OK, I admit this is totally tasteless and politically irreverent. But little boys have a way of reducing things to their essence and Fatty is a perfect example. - courtesy of cousin Al N.
Chicken Sandwiches - I think a few of us have already exceeded their quota. Cluck-cluck. Rated PG, cause you might have to explain it! Thanx Al N.
Wayne's THE PAINTER. God didn't like the way Wayne did bizness. Thanx Al N.
PAYBACK
How to Prank a Telemarketer - if you have a minute or two -- you HAVE to listen to this. VERY funny stuff. [I heard it on the radio. Trust Pam, it IS funny. And I liked the text in conjunction with the audio. It seemed slow loading, even for me. Too bad, all the telemarketers know about it now -- Richard] Rated PG. Thanx Pam G.
QUICKIES
Just some shots to bring pleasure, wonder, amazement, awe to your ocular units. Yeah, your ocular units - that's the ticket!
All these links are being archived before they make this page too huge. Check the "quickies" link in the upper left nav bar.
THE CLASSICS
You've probably seen these but may have forgotten about them. I thought they were too good to trash.
Catholics In Vegas - I knew that..... Rated G.
Real 911 Calls, believe it or not!! - Thanx cousin Al N.
No Pun Intended - for lovers of very weak humor. Rated G. Thanx cousin Al N.
True Southerners - the unabridged bible on the subject. Much of it's not news to me, must be one. Luuuuuu dem grits and pee-can pie, darlin'. Rated G.
Stand back, out of the way of a young man in pursuit of a Driver's Permit. Rated G. Thanx Pam G.
A Little Less Funny, More Interesting/Intellectual
World's Easiest Quiz - four correct out of 10 questions is all it takes. Rated G. Thanx bro Jim V.
INTERESTING GEOGRAPHY - well here's a heap of otherwise useless info (still interesting). Thanx Pam G.
Ever wonder about seemingly trivial things? I do. For fun, let's explore the world of sinfully rich Oil Barons in the Middle East. Here's an example. After all, It's Just Gas Money !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Thanx Amanda C.
Ever wonder what a day with the Blue Angels would be like? In the air? Close up? Here's a photo journal. This is as close as I'll ever get!! BTW, these are some Awesome pictures..... - Thanx Amanda C.
A Tale of Two Houses - never fear, folks, Al Gore is here to save us and our planet. Check this example. Thanks Al N.
The 2008 Presidential Race is off and running. A bit early, don't you agree? In any case, this info has come in and I believe that I would be remiss if I didn't reproduce it here for those who might be planning to vote for Mr. Obama. I can neither confirm nor deny the accuracy of this info. Read it and research the matter for yourself. Personally (and as usual), I see no candidates among the pack that has reared it's head. Nonetheless, the burning question remains: Who is Barack Obama? - Thanks Al N.
2005 NBC Photos - a MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation that offers the best of the best photos for 2005.
DOWNLOAD (1.5MB)
[ http://www.esryle.com/coblinks/grafix/2005nbcphotos.pps ]
WOW - a MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation. The name pretty much says it all.
DOWNLOAD (1.3MB)
[ http://www.esryle.com/coblinks/grafix/wow.pps ]
A Little Less Funny, More FUN!!!
If you still have a couple of minutes after surfin', you might like to try your hand at the slickest little Java applet arcade game that I've found anywhere on the Net. It's called TAILGUNNER by Mike Hall; no, it isn't Army-Air Corps and World War II. It is the deepest caverns of interstellar space and MIND-LESS DESTRUCTION!! Totally point based, limitless ammunition and nearly devoid of strategy, you won't see these aliens shoot back much until they get past you. I got audio files, too, 'cause I knew it'd be nothing without them. My best score is 119,775 but I'm just a novice, an amateur, a nimrod, a lad, a squirrel. Surely you can beat that, DeadEye!!!! Soooooooo.......... wanna take a ride? Rated G.
A Little Less Funny, More Sobering
WARNING!! VERY GRAPHIC - Crocodile Severs Zoo Worker's Arm - a crocodile at a zoo in the southern Taiwan city of Kaohsiung holds the forearm of a zoo veterinarian in between its teeth, April 11, 2007. The crocodile bit off the arm of the zoo veterinarian treating it, an official reported. The photo series (7) starts here. If ya messes with the bull, ya gets the horns...........Thanx Pam G. Rated PG.
WE DON'T NEED NO STINKIN' CATALYTIC CONVERTERS, MAN!
(or Cadillac convertibles as I heard someone call them once)
Like OLD IRON and FAST STREET RIDES? COMING SOON!!!
In the meantime, check my small block Ford crankin', 1964 Ranchero buffin' pahtnah Bob's wheels from San Diego, CA. Oooooowwwww charp - and OEM (except what isn't, he-he-he). OK, it has one or two Boss 302 parts on it. I could tell you more but then - well, you know the rest. Click and surmise for yourself.
Jeep® Waterfall - from Detroit to Beijing, the Jeep Waterfall has mesmerized auto showgoers from across the globe. Tune in to discover how this H2O wonder works. [Whatever floats yer boat - Jeep, Toyota, Yugo, Big Wheel, the Comments & Responses section is also worth a peek. -- Richard] Thanx bro Jim V.
It's a Police Chase between a Cruiser and a Shelby Mustang 500GT (I assume). What I see wrong is that the Cruiser would be in the dust were it real life. Careful tho, street racers, when wheelbarrowing your hard-earned dolares down to the Fode Stowe. Big Bro's radios, electronics and heck-ti-choppers are better than ever. Will the new Ponies pound the ground like days of old? My guess, sadly, no way Ray. Forty years have marched down the Pike, emission laws are rampant, Carroll's had a heart transplant, push water ain't the same. It's like my old Thai girlfriend said when disappointed with a fancy trip to Puket. "What's wrong, baby?" "Dis ni' but it not Mal-ay-see-a." Dis ni' but it not a Shelby AC Cobra 427SC. Thanx Bob T.
HOT Street Rod Slide Show - this is a collection of some of the street rod photos that this rodder has on his computer. Hope you enjoy. The music is Maple Leaf Rag by Scott Joplin.
Grand Rod Run '06 - slide show of the 2006 Grand Rod Run in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee.
Tools and Their Real Uses - Doug S. sends this abridged yet handy tool reference. I notice that staples like the Crescent Hammer and Knuckle Buster (Stilson Wrench) aren't included. Dare we hope for Revision 1? Thanx Doug.
For Submariners 
Thanx Colleen759 for animated sub graphic.
For more submarine links try my CHIEF OF THE BOAT (LINKS) site. 10,000 submarine links and growing (that's a lotta links)!
OK, this video series is just too cool. It appears to be a future U.S. Navy boomer, on patrol in space. The videos are hard to describe. Basically, they feature a couple of animated "Halo"-type FPS video game characters with Navy crows and dolphins standing around shooting the breeze on watch. The most recent one features a qual checkout and a s-t-s with "Sailor-to-English translation" provided. If you just close your eyes and listen to them, you'll think you're back on the boat hearing pretty much exactly what you'd expect to hear on any midwatch.. Be aware that you'll have to do a download in one form or fashion, 10-20mb and most of us are there for the audio portion. Oh, and it's definitely NSFW if you don't have headphones.
Hey, Shipwreck - Episodes 1 thru 9.
Hey, Shipwreck - the Latest Episode Release. This is supposed to be updated regularly.
Do You Call Yourself American?
Concerned For America's Future? You Should Be.....Most Gracious Father God-Bless America.
Please Pray for the Safety of the United States, our Troops, our Citizens, and for Peace in the World. Thanx Pam G.
It is entitled YOU WORRY ME and is just as worrisome today as in 2001.
This is called Food For Thought but I think War On Terrorism with a Brief History of the 20th Century 101 would be more appropriate. Yeah, it IS a long read. But you need to understand this so that there is no confusion about why we are doing what we're doing. Your very life (or way of life) may depend on it! If you choose to bury your head in the sand about this, you very likely will become a victim of it. So just digest small chunks and come back for more if that's what it takes. Thanx Pam G.
Isn't this something like What You Would Like To Hear Tonight?. I think most of us would answer in the affirmative. After reading, ponder this. If most of us agree with the spirit of "What You Would Like To Hear Tonight?", then exactly who is it who's electing and re-electing the mental giants who faithfully act in direct opposition to it? Somethin' don't smell right. Thanx Doug S.
Remember Gordon Sinclair? He has left us, his work has not - the content is a little dated, the sentiment is not. Follow this link to see what he thought of America - Gordon was Canadian.
Thomas Jefferson and the Quran - did you follow the election and swearing in of Keith Ellison? He represents the 5th U.S. Congressional District of Minnesota and is Muslim. He thinks that Thomas Jefferson was a visionary. READ THIS and learn Jefferson's and early America's real story. HOOOO-RAH! We should have paid attention in American History class. Thanx bro Jim V.
Should Marines Pray? - the ACLU doesn't think so. Rated G. Thanx David L.
Do you ever ask yourself if Texans are patriotic? Do they support our Military? Here's your answer. Just a little old country town, not much to see - conducting A Funeral In Texas. Rated G. Thanx David L.
Freedom Isn't Free - Thanx David L.
Valiant Shield 2006 - a MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation that chronicles the United States Navy's surface presence in the Pacific off Guam, 2006-style. Oh, other branches were represented, too, but not so much in this one.
DOWNLOAD (2.6MB)
[ http://www.esryle.com/coblinks/grafix/valiantshield06.pps ]
Armed Forces - Thunderbird and Blue Angel photographs in addition to many special planes including the Stealth Bomber, B2, and the latest F/A-22. Also, includes Exercise Valiant Shield with the Air Force's Stealth Bomber working with the Carriers Abraham Lincoln and Ronald Reagan and the Kitty Hawk Carrier Strike Group on maneuvers in the Philippine Sea. Great photos of warships in action. A MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation.
DOWNLOAD (6.6MB)
Snapshots from Iraq - photographs of the fierce fighting in that war. It ends with a stirring rendition of The Star Spangled Banner by Whitney Houston. A MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation.
DOWNLOAD (2.6MB)
American Cemeteries - photographs of eleven American Cemeteries in France, the final resting place for 66,033 Americans who died fighting there. A MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation.
DOWNLOAD (610KB)
Remember Pearl Harbor - 18 newly found black and white photos of Pearl Harbor. See what it took to decare war on Imperial Japan in 1941. Lee Greenwood performs God Bless The USA. A MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation.
DOWNLOAD (3.3MB)
9/11/01 - relates the unprovoked radical Muslim attack with spectacular pictures. Lee Greenwood sings America the Beautiful. A MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation.
DOWNLOAD (3.9MB)
Need A Little Inspiration?
The Dash Movie - from The Dash by Linda Ellis - it's all about the dash between the dates and how you spend it that counts, you stinkybutt poophead.......I cried. Thanx sweet Pam G., your dash is blessed.
My Wish For You - mine for you, too. Thanx Pam G.
THE STORY OF EDITH BURNS... - an Easter story. Thanx Pam G.
Packing Your Parachute - had any help packing yours today? Go sit down, my friend. Thanx Pam G.
One Glass Of Milk (a good story!) - read and weep. Thanx Pam G.
Old Pam just loves dat Honky Tonk Piano - midt da animated grafix und inspiration! FUN!!! Thanx Pam G.
GOD LIVES UNDER THE BED - and He is Kevin's best bud. Thanx Pam G.
Ten Commandments In Cajun - an get yuself summa dat gumbo! Yu face gonna fall off, I gar-rone-tee! Thanx Pam G.
Mud Puddles - and the children shall lead them...... Thanx Pam G.
~He Is God~ - not much that can be added after you read this. Thanx Pam G.
Ten Things God Won't Ask - a MicroSoft PowerPoint Presentation that will make you think. Thanx Pam G. DOWNLOAD (1.2MB)
[ http://www.esryle.com/coblinks/grafix/tenthingsgodwontask.pps ]
Prayer?
A Short Prayer - just takes a few seconds. Thanx Pam G.
Today's Prayer - Thanx Pam G.
God Always Answers Prayer - Thanx Pam G.
I am a Christian - Thanx Pam G.
Got Time For God? He ALWAYS has time for you! Note: There were beautiful pix along with this; however, the stock footage site warned of dire punishment for violators. Shame. Thanx David L.
Adopt a serviceperson and add him or her to your prayer time.
The Presidential Prayer Team - Mobilizing Millions of Americans to pray daily for our President, our Leaders, our Nation and our Armed Forces.
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meantime, check my small block Ford crankin', 1964 Ranchero buffin' pahtnah Bob's wheels from San Diego, CA. Oooooowwwww charp - and OEM (except what isn't, he-he-he). OK, it has one or two Boss 302 parts on it. I could tell you more but then - well, you know the rest. Click and surmise for yourself.
